Sunday, April 19, 2009

Sheer Bliss

Today's post isn't just about a topic I've learned about. This topic is about something that I've experienced in my life and know that I know. Want to know how fun it is to be wrong? Better yet, do you want to know the sheer bliss of letting someone else be right? Let me describe it to you.

There is an absolute joy with allowing someone else to be right. As much as YOU want to be right, picture the other person that you're engaged with hearing that wonderful phrase from you, "You know what? I think you're right." You will see the other person's whole countenance change, their faces often light up and they smile an approving smile. Nothing beats watching that emotional evolution.

For much of my childhood years I was told that I was stupid and made to feel very insignificant. I never understood, growing up, that would create an insatiable need to be right. It would be many years before I discovered that I didn't want people to think I was stupid. I wanted everyone to think I was intelligent. It would be even more years before I realized the impact of being teachable (which is VERY intelligent) vs. knowing everything. Notice I said teachable and not dumb or stupid. I've personally NEVER looked at someone who said I was right as stupid. In fact, the very opposite has always occurred. Because of my amazingly high opinion of myself, I always feel that the person agreeing with anything that I would have to say, is a complete genius!!! I'm joking of course, but kind of not. We all react that way. Agreement is the ultimate acceptance and instills immediate respect. You will also find yourself with a much more receptive audience during discussions that you just cannot admit that someone is right. Everyone will rethink why it is that you do not agree when you are typically so agreeable. They will not perceive your disagreement as offensive, but will be more empathetic toward your view because the acceptance and respect has already been cultivated. We find ourselves immediately on the offensive with the people who know everything aren't we? We are just waiting for that person to correct us leaving us feeling rejected and.... insignificant. I would take making someone feel wonderfully important over feeling insignificant and rejected any day. THAT is sheer bliss!

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